Words

and i was some kind of falling
through the cracks, the old cliche
but that's not right

i talked of drowning, talked of wanting
to stay down there
in the sea
but that's not right

no desperation, here
no rapid trip and stumble into
what we need
no fucking concentration
bent on nothing
but we want

and i was wordless in the twilight
watched the sun go down and felt it
draw the life out of the sky
bleed it back in through the moon and i was

color all around
i was black and grey and dreaming i was
iridescent everything
and everywhere the air was dense with
smoke and incense and the taste of something
faint and long forgotten
and i breathed it in
i kept it
i was helpless fucking
powerful
intensity is nothing
sans intent.

and there were stars,
just like always.

and the words, of course
came back
crept slowly up my spine into my brain
to make me feel
to make me feel again
jumbled and dyslexic spun around until they made something like
sense in there,
the letters and the time
can go to hell
time can go to hell
and i am laughing
and the words
don't matter now.