Work Through Small Differences to Maintain a Long Term Relationship

It can be hard to tell when your dating relationship becomes what is known as a long term relationship. Some say that it is when you agree to be monogamous, others feel that you aren't in a "relationship" until you weather your first storm together and come out intact and still committed to one another.

Commitment

While you may not be able to pinpoint when you will feel as if you're in a long term relationship, one indicator that you are indeed there for the long haul is your commitment to the relationship. When arguments or disagreements don't immediately make you think the relationship is over, then you know that you are committed to working it out and making your relationship last.

However being in a long term relationship isn't all wine and roses, there are ups and downs, challenges and of course the disagreements that may make you wonder if you are truly where you should be. But the value of all those things is that they combine to show you just how deeply you are in love and how committed you are to staying together.

Challenges

As with any relationship there are challenges to being in a long term relationship. Each of you are individuals and you must learn to compromise, to share and to communicate in order to make the relationship strong and lasting. Some of the challenges that long term relationships face may seem to be impossible to conquer, but with communication and commitment you can tackle anything that life throws at you and remain a strong and united couple.
*Expectations of marriage can be the death knell for many long term relationships. If one partner is expecting that the relationship will lead to marriage and the other is happy with the way things are it's important for you to get on the same page. Communicate what you want out of the relationship and work together to find a compromise.

*Financial difficulties strike all too often. When one partner makes more money than the other, but you aren't married is it your partner's responsibility to support you financially? In reality, no. But your partner should be willing to help you out, get you back on your feet or otherwise share in making your long term relationship better by working with you to achieve your goals. By not being married financial issues are generally separate. How you combine your financial responsibilities is up to you, and with communication and compromise you will make it work for both of you.

*Habits, personality quirks and other seemingly small things can loom impossibly large over a relationship if you don't have the proper relationship skills to work through these differences. For example: I am not a morning person. I like to have my coffee and take a few hours to wake up. My partner on the other hand is up with the sun and after gulping a cup of coffee is ready to get started on his day. Over the past five years we've each learned to adapt a little to make mornings a bit more pleasant. He doesn't expect me to bound out of bed ready to go, and I don't expect him to spend two hours nursing coffee. We compromise and we connect to start our day. I have quirks and habits he doesn't like, and he has a few that drive me crazy. But we love each other, we communicate and we make it work because we are both committed to spending our lives together

Make It Last

Two people committed to being together, working toward their goals and dreams together can form the strongest foundation for a lifelong relationship with or without the benefit of marriage. But it does take a complete dedication to making it last, communication and compromise to deal with all the small challenges and even the big challenges that you will face as a couple. Each upheaval or storm that you weather makes the base of your relationship stronger. By learning to work together and not against each other you will find that you are not only in a long term relationship but that you are happy in that relationship and that you will begin not to think of "I" or "you" but "we" because you are a united entity facing down all challenges to be in love, to be together and to be happy.