Worse Summer Flicks: 2009

I wish that writing up a list of the worse movies of the summer was harder to do this year. To be honest most movies I saw either left me with no impression or with a bad taste in my mouth.

It seems to me that the main problem with movies this summer is that not only did the big studios seem to lack much original thought; the franchise movies they did make were filled with big CG moments that failed to make any real impression. There were very few movies that I connected with this season.

This list is the worse of the worse.

Land of the Lost: This movie was the biggest bomb of the summer and with good reason. This film is a series of CG sight gags strung together by Will Farrell doing the same shtick that he has been doing for years. This movie is tired and bland but worse of all its not funny. The folks involved tried to cash in on TV nostalgia but couldn't even make a movie that felt true to the TV show that wasn't that good to begin with. This movie should have never been made; thankfully it didn't do well enough to warrant a sequel.

Dance Flick: Why do these movies keep getting made? Who is to blame? If you are reading this and went to see this movie please explain. I slipped in to watch a bit of this flick before going to see another film. I got about ten minutes of it and that is all I needed. The folks that are making these spoof movies are not even holding themselves to any real genre any more. There are maybe one or two dance movies an entire year, they don't deserve their own movie spoofing them. Half the jokes I watched had little do with dance movies. Again another movie with bad jokes held together loosely by a nearly non-existent narrative.

Whatever Works: Woody Allen you can do better than this. We are not fooled, this movie is nothing new, and it's just a rehash of your older films. This whole movie is Larry David doing a Woody Allen impersonation with a script that is literally thirty years old. As of late Allen has seem to have had himself a little bit of a creative resurgence. His movies felt fresh and new. This movie is like a big security blanket for the old man. I was so disappointed.

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen: Robots are suppose to be cool right? I mean this was going to be the summer of the robots. Yet Terminator didn't really end up being that great and this movie was even worse. How hard is it to make this movie cool? All you need is good robots and bad robots fighting each other with humans caught in the middle. Yet half this movie is devoted to a plot that is boring and hard to believe. I was bored for a good hour of this movie. The final scene drags on forever. Pointless battle after pointless battle with very few of the action scenes being very good and then we get to the ultimate showdown of the movie, only to have a short anti-climatic battle. I pray this is the end of this series.

Bruno: I know I am supposed to find this movie funny. The thing is I do find it funny, I laughed at parts. It's not a terribly made movie but I have a major issue with this film. Playing a gay stereotype while trying to make fun of people who are homophobic seems pretty hypocritical to me. In the end this movie felt like a really offensive joke that was trying to make a statement for a group of people it ended up mocking the most. I think it went to far and in the end it turned me off.

Movies that might make this list by the end of summer: G I Joe, and The Final Destination