Would You Try Internet Dating? Are Dating Sites Introducing Partners for Life or for Casual Sex?

Internet dating is big business with millions of people online every day looking at sites like Meetic, Match.com and AdultFriendFinders.

Romantic Chemistry - or Just Sexual Chemistry?

Sites can help you find a partner with matching interests whether you're into mountain climbing, Mozart or masochism. Plenty of people report finding partners online but many internet daters - women mostly - complain that sites can be overloaded with men - often married men - looking for casual sex.

Here, three woman describe their experiences on two different sites.

Natalie:

"My husband ran away with one of our friends in 2009. It was out of the blue. I had no idea they were having an affair. Since then, and we're not divorced yet, I've steered clear of any kind of proper relationship. I don't trust men and I don't want to get involved. I certainly don't want to give commitment and I don't think man are able to frankly. But I've always had a very high sex drive. So once I was on my own, I joined a couple of the sites and started dating. My profile made it clear I was looking for fun and of course men interpret that, rightly in this case, as wanting casual sex. I've quite often hooked up in the evening with a guy I met in 'Chat' during the day. And I've quite often had sex with a guy I met that day. I'm very relaxed about that as long as it's safe sex. If two people are unattached, find each other attractive and want to have sex, there's no problem, right? It's healthy. I've hardly ever seen a guy twice, but that's OK. Maybe I'll change my mind one day but at the moment I just want a night out once or twice a week and no ties. One guy who was quite sweet contacted me the day after and I did see him again. But he was looking for a partner. Most of the guys, once they know you're OK with it, just say they're after casual sex. None have ever said they're married but I know one was because his wife called when we were in bed!"

Sarah:

"I broke up with my last boyfriend after three years. I live in Paris and you'd think it would be easy to meet someone new but it isn't, even in France with its reputation for romance. I'm 35 and it's as if everyone is either too young to get serious or already hooked up. I'd quite like to have a baby before it's too late. When I tried internet dating I was prepared to meet loads of weirdos online. And I did! I got guys who started on about sex straight away. And guys who were obviously not native French or English speakers but pretended they were. I had one guy who kept saying I must be angry with him or cross and then started suggesting I tell him how cross I was... He was some jerk who was into domination and punishment. Yeeugh. Quite a lot of them were obviously married guys. Once I experimented and said to a few guys 'I don't care if you're married or not' - then they admitted they were and said they just wanted a fling. Bye-ee. Or I had guys who wrote over the top weird romantic stuff as if they thought that was what a woman wanted to hear from a man she'd never even met. After sifting through hundreds of profiles, I went out with four guys. One looked nothing like his profile and was very unattractive. One thought he was god's gift to women and he wasn't. One kept fiddling around with his wallet and looking at drinks prices and didn't offer to pay when we left. I started seeing the fourth guy because he seemed really nice, was quite funny and was quite good-looking. He'd been divorced though and after a few months it became obvious he totally wasn't over his wife. He couldn't settle in a new relationship and so neither could I. He talked about her all the time. We broke up, but we still talk from time to time. Meanwhile I'll just have to meet someone in the supermarket, a bookshop or an art gallery because I'm taking a break from internet dating. It takes loads of time and effort, costs too much, and it doesn't work."

Pamela:

"My husband left me four years ago and we divorced. Then I went out with a man who turned out to be aggressive and was eventually violent. My self-confidence was ruined and I had no faith in men at all. I thought I'd be alone for the rest of my life. I was only 42. But a friend persuaded me to try internet dating and finally I agreed. I wrote that I was looking for a proper relationship and met several guys who seemed very pleasant but there was no chemistry and nothing developed. Then after about five months I was contacted by Mark. He was in the north of the country and I'm in the south so although he sounded nice I didn't think anything would come of it. I mentioned the town where I live and he replied he lived there too. He just hadn't mentioned that he was in the north on a temporary contract. When I asked where he lived it was in the building opposite! Of course, we had to meet when he got back and the chemistry was absolutely instant. He's funny and gorgeous and lovable. And it was his ex-wife who cheated after many years so he wasn't the one who ruined their marriage. We have so many things in common, it's incredible. We even know some of the same people. He asked me to marry him six months after we met - we were already more or less living together. And we got married last summer. It was a big wedding, with both families there in force - his three grown-up kids and my two - and all our friends. We're incredibly happy. When people ask how we met we say straight away that it was through Meetic. I thought I'd be embarrassed about it but I couldn't care less. I'm just glad we did!"