I was having a telephone conversation with my mother recently and she seemed a bit distracted. Having known her for quite awhile (that would be my whole life), I instinctively, knew exactly why her mind was wandering. She had that preoccupied tone that was evidence to me that she was, yet again, working on a crossword puzzle while simultaneously making a semi-effort to converse with me. She's a cruciverbalist, you see. (that is the newly invented definition for a person who adores working crossword puzzles) I was attempting to tell this cruciverbalist about the interesting "goings on" in my day when she interrupted me in mid-sentence and blatantly asked, "Is there any other Rose in "Guns and Roses" with three letters other than Axl?"
In stunned disbelief, I said, "Mama, you're not supposed to know stuff like that! How in the world would you know about Axl Rose?"
Her reply was, "Well, I've been around a long time. With 78 years worth of living, I've gathered all types of information along the way. Some of which is important and some is trivial. You essentially become loaded with minutia." Hmmm.... just the fact that "minutia" was her word choice instead of "junk" says it all about her lengthy existence on earth.
She continued on as she profoundly said, "You have a choice. You can either go throughout your life as a magnet for the interesting education of the offerings of life, along with its trivia, or you can choose to close yourself off and become a recluse out of touch with the world and miss out on all of its interesting aspects."
She is a very cool mom, I must say. And she's right, you know. It is ultimately our choice to decide whether or not we drink in all the interesting aspects of life'"the necessary, along with the unnecessary. Will we see life as an interesting dimension where we learn and enjoy all avenues'"a fact finding journey--or will we disconnect and isolate ourselves from life's incredible adventures?
My mother always has just the right words to say for every type of situation. I go to her "well of strength" frequently to draw out buckets at a time for nourishment, education, and advice. With all that stored up "minutia," why not?
Several years ago I experienced a strong case of homesickness when I went on a business trip for a week to Atlanta. I reverted to the most infantile of behaviors, acting like a homesick kid at camp. My lust for home began when my son called to tell me the great news that he had been accepted into the college of his choice. I was sorry that I was so far away and unable to celebrate this unique event with him. (Did I mention I was to be there for a whole week?) I spoke to my mother on the phone and expressed my emotions. I could tell she was searching for just the right words to comfort her all grown up, baby daughter. I was just sure she would say, "It's okay, honey. Just pack your bags and come on home now." No. Instead she said, "Buck up!!" My defensive retort was, "But it only means that I really like my life and that's a good thing!" In actuality, her words were quite appropriate ones. I allowed the words "Buck up!" to continually resonate through my mind and they helped me to endure the final days of the trip with a little more strength. I have passed along the phrase to my friends who tell me they use the "Buck up" term with their family members, as well. Thanks, Mom.
She has, indeed, collected a lot of "minutia" (junk) on her personal journey called "life." She is correct in her well-indoctrinated philosophies. They include a natural concept for endurance, rising above adversity to find the positive, and a sense of humor that is imperative for balance and ultimate healthiness.
I told my mother recently that I had decided that she may not die. Her reply was, "Well, you'll have to talk to God about that." She then went on to say, "If you don't do well after I die, I'll come back and haunt you." Of course, we both burst out laughing. It's yet another bright insight in the importance of developing good coping skills.
Follow up: And, by the way, "Yes, Mama, Axl is the only Rose with three letters with Guns n' Roses."
Published by Hunter Darden
Hunter's first endeavor in the writing field began with a mystery book entitled "The Secret of the Old Oak Tree." Unfortunately, it was bound in yellow construction paper-the finest binding a fourth grader w... View profile
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