You Lose

my eyes are avoided, those screams come too late,
you carry this burden, this terrible weight,
in the middle of a meltdown, you pick up the past,
definitely not ready, for anything that's asked,
lost in a whirlwind, emotions incomplete,
whatever I am feeling, it isn't defeat,
cripple my words, so they can't break you down,
and try to erase all that I've found,
loving and losing, they come with a price,
your heart or a soul, LOVE is concise,
I am not noteworthy, you push me aside,
leaving all that we've done, alone in our life,
why am i here, in this shadow once more,
the darkness is calling, slap me to the floor,
does it make you feel good, to break me in pieces,
so you can pick it all up, with no rhyme or reason,
I am crying for help, but people pass by,
I must be invisible, but I still haven't DIED,
I feel lonely and broken, with no light at the end,
sleeping in this nightmare, starting all over again,
I need some pills, I need to be gone,
you don't understand, YOU ARE SO WRONG!!!
I am torn into bits, and bursting with rage,
by the time you get home, it will be much too late,
I wrote you a letter one filled with pain,
and left it on the door, so you can read it.. just wait!
you left me no choice, bottle it up and suck it down,
the pills that I took, were all your lies laying around,
this may make no sense, only to my heart,
but since I have known you, Ive been broken apart,
what other option do I have when Ive got none left?
what else can I do, nothing tastes so sweet as death,
You didn't defeat me, coward, you lost the most,
because now I am free, and you are my ghost...