Your Love List

We all know that relationships take work. With the busy world we live in it is easy to lose focus on your relationship and what you want your relationship to be. An important thing to do in your relationship is to set goals together for what the two of you want in life. Couples always talk about their dreams in life and what they want in the future, but they don't sit down and talk seriously about these things. Grab a pen and notebook, turn off the television, and take a seat next to your loved one. Make a list together of all the things you want to accomplish in life.

The key to making this a relationship building activity is to make sure that everything on that list involves the two of you. These should be things that you want to do together in life. If you are hoping to finally beat that video game you've been playing, that doesn't go on the list. If the two of you are trying to beat a video game together, put that down as one of your goals. If you want to quit smoking and your loved one doesn't smoke, then don't put it on the list. If you both want to quit smoking, then add that.

Creating this list together serves several purposes. First, it allows the two of you to sit down and really talk about what you want in life. Any time the television is off and you are talking, you are helping your relationship. Talking about your future is good because it reminds the two of you that you have a future together. So many times in life we get caught up in the little things and caught up in the moment. We forget that we are a team and we are working together toward a common goal.

When you are creating this list, you want to make sure that this is a fun experience for the two of you. Of course, you want to make sure your list includes some serious goals, but not everything in your relationship should be serious. Are there any fun, romantic things that you want to do together? Any places the two of you want to travel? Is there something you have always wanted to do and never got around to it? All of these things should be on the list.

How often you update your list is really up to you. My husband and I make sure that we at least update it once a year on our anniversary. It is fun to read through our past goals and see how many we have accomplished, how many we no longer want to accomplish, and what we are still working toward. Then we sit down together and add more goals to the list.

At first this may be a difficult activity, especially if you have been in your relationship for a while and already done so much together. If you think it will be hard to come up with activities, talk about the list two days before you make it. Tell your loved one that you would like to make the list in a couple of days and both of you should be thinking about what should be on the list. Once you are in the mind set that you are going to create this list, you will be amazed at how many little things you think of in that two days. It will make the actual list making experience more fun.

To give you some more ideas of things you can add to your list, here are some things that have been on our love lists over the past four years.

Own a dog

Watch the sun rise at least once a year

Plant flowers every spring

Watch Christmas movies every Christmas

Look at the stars together

Take Sunday naps

Attend fairs and parades

Read the comics together

Grow a garden

Bring each other breakfast in bed

Go for a walk in the rain

Sit side by side in a booth and share a banana split

Take silly photos in an instant photo booth

Watch old romantic movies

Plant trees

Plan our wedding together

Buy great books, even if we never read them

Go antique shopping

Take a college class together, just for fun

Recycle

Build a snowman together

Build a piece of furniture together

Go skinny dipping

Make a time capsule

Share a plate of spaghetti

Go to Europe

Go on a 2 day canoe trip

Pick our own fruit or berries at an orchard

Go paddle boating

Go ice skating

Carve our initials in a tree

Get old fashion photos taken

Start saving money

Make love more

Start a family

Lose 30 pounds

Buy a Home

Go to a concert

Go to church

See a Broadway Play

Try new recipes

Go to a sporting event

Have a couples massage

See Niagara Falls

Learn more about wine

Wine taste

Go to a haunted house

Get our portrait made

Try new restaurants

Go on a cruise

Visit more local towns

Eat Sushi

Learn to make crab cakes

Learn to make crepes

Everything on this list are things that we enjoy doing together or that the other person has always wanted to do together. Your list will really say a lot about you and what you want to accomplish together in your life. Remember to include short term and long term goals, serious and fun goals, and use this opportunity to build your relationship.