Your Story

You asked me to write your story
And I told you I didn't know how
Without making you cry and hang your head in shame
But you said you didn't care
You need the words before you
But you are dry - you have nothing left inside
So I sat down with an ache
And these are the words that came before me...

I try so hard to look in the mirror
But each time I do I cringe and walk away
My reflection is the reflection of a girl I loathe
And love all the same

I try to sing and laugh and smile
And I succeed for some time
But these tears are taking me over
Pulling me under
And I can't lie any longer

Temptation surrounds me and I run from it
My legs carry me round and round in circles
Until I face him again and beg for salvation
And he lifts me up and takes me away
Then places me gently on my feet
Walks without turning back

An endless circle of self-defeat and hatred
I beat away at the core of me
And I can't feel it anymore
My entirety is numb

I can't find where it is that I went
Where my sanity resides
And my happiness clings
And I turn to him and hope he'll heal me
But all it does is shatter me more
Guilt and need encompass me
And I feel twisted and shattered and whole all at once...

I read these words to you
As you cling to me and sob
And when you are finished
You look at me and smile
And you say, "Yes. Exactly."