Zante Cafeneo in Tarpon Springs, Florida: Unique Restaurant, Horrible Service

Zante Cafeneo in downtown Tarpon Springs, Florida, boasts a goldenrod take-out menu of "Truly Great Food." The restaurant serves an eclectic menu of Cajun, Greek, Creole, Italian, and French cuisine. Driving past the cafe every day on my way to work, next to the Pinellas Trail - a bike trail which spans 34 miles from Tarpon Springs all the way to St. Pete - I noticed right away that there was something different about the place.

Outside the double French doors stands a figure dressed in all black with a top hat next to the menu board. It was a likeness of some character you might see in an old black and white horror film. The second thing I noticed was that the menu board said Greek-Italian-French. I knew then that they would have a wide variety of food from which to chose. Being one in a 6-person household, it's very important to have a place to go where there is variety.

Parking was adequate, considering it is next to a bike trail in downtown and the street is rather narrow. There is a municipal parking lot that is separated from the cafe by an alley where you can park for free. We came in on a Saturday afternoon, myself, my fiancee, and my three sons.

As soon as we rounded the corner to the cafe, you could see through the large windows that the place was filled with antiques, toys and other odd or amusing items. We were greeted as we walked into the door by the owner. She was very pleasant at first, and I being a bit nervous when I walked in the doors and saw the massive amount of antiques and collectibles just laying about within arms reach, was comforted when she said, "Nothing's made of sugar, go ahead," after I told the boys, "Don't touch anything!"

I was immediately impressed by the uniqueness of the place. All of the tables were decorated with Victorian style dressings, but not one matched the next, and the tabletops had a variety of candles and neon steam fountains. The theme was that there was no theme. It was a bit difficult to maneuver through the narrow corridor to the back table where she [the owner] seated us. We were seated all the way at the back where three tables had been pushed together that were different heights, and there was a whirlwind fan on the end of the last one. I noticed there were whirlwind fans all around the place. I was a bit concerned about a place with no air conditioning in Florida, but it was quite comfortable.

Next to us was a wall of plush toys, and plastic toys from several eras, and a wall size mirror with gold carved wood frame. There were Picachu dolls, and Rock Em Sock Em Robots, Star Wars toys that made sounds when you pushed buttons, Roger Rabbit, Marvin the Martian, and other things that make kids go nuts, mixed in with artwork and antiques. The place was crowded, but not with people.

We were asked what we wanted to drink, and the menu boasted thirteen coffees from gourmet blends to frappe,espresso, and cafe au lait. They also boasted over 30 teas to choose from. My fiancee, being the coffee addict, and I being the Sweet Tea critic, well . . . they had their work cut out for them, but we assumed by the menu that they were more than capable of suiting our tastes. My fiancee ordered the frappe, and I the sweet tea, with no lemon.

When the drinks arrived, the tea was lemon, or raspberry . . . something tart, and it was awful. When I asked the owner, who was serving us, she pretended like she didn't really know what type of tea she gave me, because they have so many. She handed my fiancee a water, and told him it would be a while on his frappe. The boys had one tea and two Pepsi, so they were pretty satisfied with that. The Pepsi were brought out in cans to be poured over ice. I opted to have a Pepsi as well.

The boys were told by the owner to grab a toy and take it to the table to play with. A few minutes later the lady was freaking out, and asking them not to break anything. I guess some things are made of sugar after all.

Then the bread was served. It was like a garlic butter brushed dinner roll that was sliced. One for each of us, and they were quite good. We were asked if we wanted more bread, and of course we did, but before it was brought to us, the owner came to the table again to tell me that they didn't have the catfish I ordered. They were also out of chips, which I forgot to mention earlier when my son ordered his hot dog, he ha to get fries instead. My oldest son wanted shrimp and pasta, and they accommodated his special order.

My other son ordered chicken strips, no complaints. My fiancee had the Jambalaya, a heaping plate full. Of course it was a while before the owner came back to ask what I wanted in place of the catfish that they were out of. I finally got her attention before she walked out the door to go pick up her kids, and told her that I wanted the Chicken Melt. And though baked potatoe was on the menu, they were also out of that, so I had to get fries as well. Only they were more like burnt potato wedges.

While she was gone, a friend of hers took over waiting on us. We still hadn't received the bread that we were offered ten minutes before, and my fiancee (after half an hour) had not received his frappe. So when the woman who was standing in as waitress came by the table to tell us that he wasn't getting his frappe, we were pretty annoyed. We also asked about the bread again, to no avail. Finally I just let it out. I just started complaining to this woman about the service.

She looked at me sideways, and explained that the owner was serving me, and her husband was the cook, and she was just there to help out while the owner picked her kids up from school. As if that excused the service. I just wanted to go to a restaurant and get what I ordered, and she was talking to me like I was wrong because I wasn't satisfied with the service. Finally she offered to have the co-owner come speak to me when he was finished cooking my food.

After our meal was served, they finally brought that bread. The owner came out and asked how everything was, and was very intimidating. I just said, fine. His wife had returned, and over heard one of the boys ask me if they could have their birthday party here. She chimed in that they should have their party at Chuckie Cheese.

We were very unsatisfied with the service, the lack of availability of menu items, and the overall tone that the owners expressed when they served us. Although the place is very unique, and a great idea, the owners just didn't cut it. The kids cleared our table, and were very nice, but the rest of the people were rude and indifferent. We will not be returning to the Zante Cafeneo.