Zen and the iPhone Game

Before they became a second job, an interactive spamming platform, and a breeding ground for immature idiots to shoot and taunt each other in a virtual combat setting knowing that the chance of getting shot or taunted in real life were next to nil, people turned to video games for recreation and relaxation. The stress from a hard day of work could easily melt away with a few minutes of button pushing instant gratification and associated visual stimulation. But now with the aforementioned evolutions of game play, I occasionally miss the halcyon days when I could ignore high scores, achievements, overly dramatized cut scenes that break game play, rare items, invites from friends I only socialize with online, and taunts from a teenager who keeps shooting me at my spawn point and just enjoy the GAME part of a video game.

For once, I can thank Steve Jobs for producing something beyond an easily accessible fashion accessory that occasionally does some work.

I finally joined the 21st century this past Christmas when my lovely girlfriend gave me my first Apple device: A 4th generation iPod Touch. While lacking a phone feature like its brethren, I was glad to hear that the Wi-Fi feature allowed me to download and use most iPhone apps without the need to lock myself into another cellphone contract. For the past year or so, businesses kept requesting me to download the apps that related to their fields but I lacked a device to actually do so. Now that I had my iTouch, I could quickly go about ignoring their requests and get those gaming apps that I've been playing at the Apple stores for free while the salespeople nervously wondered when I was going to talk to them about buying their products.

I know that iPhones, iPod Touches, and iPads lack the serious processing powers as my gaming consoles, computers, and portable devices. So I was not expecting the same cinematic game play of "Uncharted's" Nathan Drake. If they really tried, the most an Apple "i-" product could do was Nathan Drake's hairpiece and even animating that would probably crash the device. But at least I would be spared his snarky comments. But I was surprised to see the variety of games that have genuinely fun gaming elements on the iPhone/iPod Touch/iPad that go beyond a cookie cutter variety of simple color matching tile games-even if there are plenty of those as well.

The top selling iPhone game is Rovio's "Angry Birds." Featuring a colorful presentation, the game pits the titular angry birds against stationary pigs protected by houses that lack cement. There is a story told through simple illustrations but it can all go moot thanks to its simple and unique game play. The player simply touches the screen to throw birds via slingshot hoping to barrel through the houses into the pigs. The destructive elements has that destructive fun gleaned from knocking over Lego buildings as a kid or watching the spectacular display of buildings getting demolished. There is nothing more satisfying than watching an entire landscape of pigs and building materials explode into smoke and debris using only one angry bird with plenty of others to spare. The whole spectacle is an enlightening experience; especially when you did it without any game guide to help. But then the whole joy gets marred when that one spectacular trick shot only netted one star out of three. The star rating system needs a lot of work or possible elimination for a truly Zen experience.

My second favorite iPhone game that fills me with Zen-like peace is Halfbrick's "Fruit Ninja." This game has even less of a story than "Angry Birds:" Slice fruit up. Fruit flies all over the screen and the katana disguised as your finger slices them and the juices splatter like blood. My one complaint is how the fruit always slices neatly in half no matter how I slice it. But the simple elegance provides a Zen experience just like popping bubble wrap.
Come to think of it, when will there be a good Apple app for popping bubble wrap? It would definitely calm the nerves after a stressful work meeting.